Mood Pancaroba

Andai lo tau apa yang gue lakukan saat ini, gue sedang mengedarkan pandang ke tiap sudut kamar. Kertas bertebaran. Alat tulis berserakan. Laptop nyala berderang. Dan mood gue nyaris sekerang arang.

Gue tau sih semua penulis pasti pernah merasakan ini: nggak mood nyentuh keyboard, ide kayak lagi ngantre lampu merah, dan bawaannya muak ngebuka file yang sedang on progress. Saat ini gue lagi mengalami itu. Entah ini karena gue yang moody atau apa, hal ini dipicu masalah sepele: esai SMP gue ilang.

Itu bukan sekadar esai, Bung. Itu adalah esai 4 halaman full folio yang gue tuntaskan dalam dua jam dan menjadi kendaraan gue menuju takhta juara kedua lomba esai tentang lingkungan. Padahal selama ini gue selalu bawa tuh kertas, di binder. Dan giliran sekarang gue butuh, jrenggg! It was like, halo-kakak-saya-sedang-menghilang-harap-tinggalkan-pesan-dan-ciptakan-esai-baru-Anda.

Ah, sudahlah.

Jujur aja sih, sebagian orang nganggep itu ide yang paling susah dicari. But for me, it was mood that hard to find. Ketika gue lagi mood, gue nempelin pantat ke bangku juga udah penuh tuh kertas A4. Mood gue yang paling bagus adalah ketika gue nyelesain buku Bluish seri pertama, which only took 3 days to complete. Bentar ya, gue mau mengenang masa-masa jaya dulu.

Gue akuin, lingkungan itu sangat berpengaruh dalam pencarian mood. Mungkin dulu gue selalu mood karena gue bersosialisasi dengan baik; gue main dengan teman-teman dan menciptakan petualangan kami sendiri. FYI, 24 Hours Stay at School itu diangkat dari kisah nyata, loh. Dan Ello di Fantastic Five serta Nathan di Bluish, hmm, itu adalah duplikat untuk orang yang sama. Masalahnya sih, sekarang gue sedang menulis novel yang ada Ello-nya, dan si inspirator sudah nggak ada di sini lagi.

Oke, lanjut.

Dulu waktu SMP, gue punya banyak waktu buat main-main. Seneng-seneng. Worry a little, laugh a lot. Sekarang segalanya udah beda. PR SMA gue numpuk and too many times to worry. Lingkungan pergaulan gue juga serius; gue berteman dengan mereka yang mulai memandang hidup dengan kacamata yang selama ini orang dewasa lakukan. Masa transisi ini menyita banyak waktu, dan orang-orang dalam fase ini juga bakal ketawa ketika lo cerita tentang ide lo yang brilian, seperti kisah tentang tokek piaraan Pak Mentri. Kadang, gue merasa imajinasi gue dibetot dari segala arah. Tapi gue selalu berpegang teguh pada frasa, "Good author are always difficult to understand."

Mungkin ini salah mood gue yang selalu ganti kayak musim pancaroba. Atau salah ide yang datang dan pergi kayak cowok PHP. Atau salah gue yang nggak mau melawan semua itu. Yang jelas sih, sekarang gue harap bukan cuma Jakarta yang kebanjiran air. Gue harap diri gue juga kebanjiran imajinasi.

Mencari Cangkang Baru

Entah dari mana gue dapet ide ini, mendadak gue nyamber laptop *ga nyamber ding, gue kebetulan baru ngelarin tugas Geografi* dan nulis kalimat ini. Mungkin karena beberapa menit yang lalu gue nonton TV. Di sana, ada artis cewek yang gue ga tau namanya. Pokoknya tiba-tiba dia nunjuk pohon pisang trus bilang, "Itu ada siput keluar dari cangkangnya!"

Temennya, cowok yang gue curigain agak lekong, pun menimpali, "APAH?! CIUS?! MIAPAH?!"

Gue secretly bersyukur adegan absurd itu ga ditambah dengan sesuatu yang lebih dramatis, seperti ada gerombolan tanjidor lewat, atau Hogwarts Express nyasar trus ngelindes si cowok. Makin abstrak bisa-bisa.

Diam-diam juga gue mikir. Apa yang akan si siput lakukan setelah ini? Apa dia bakal berkelana cukup lama? Atau dia bakal langsung nyari cangkang baru? Terus, apa yang salah dari cangkang itu? Bukannya semua cangkang, intinya sama saja? Belum lagi, adaptasi sama tempat tinggal baru itu ga semudah yang dibayangin. Belum lagi kalo ternyata si siput rada idiot. Bukannya masuk cangkang spesiesnya, dia malah ngembat cangkang kura-kura.

Setelah itu gue kaget, karena pertanyaan itu juga kerap membetot gue hari-hari belakangan ini. Si siput itu pindah. Pindah. Move on.

Pertanyaan pertama gue tadi: apakah dia akan berkelana cukup lama, atau langsung dapet cangkang baru? Ini kasusnya 11/12 sama orang yang baru putus. Apakah orang itu bakal ngejomblo bertahun-tahun, atau langsung dapet orang baru? Kalo kasusnya diaplikasikan ke gue sih, yang pasti gue jalan... jauuuuuh banget, sampe gue pegel trus nemuin tukang urut. Dalam asosiasinya, tukang urut itu ibarat orang yang menyembuhkan patah hati lo.

Permasalahan si siput belom sampe sini. Kalau pun dia berhasil mendapatkan cangkang baru, pasti segalanya berbeda. Nggak peduli seberapa nyaman cangkang baru itu buat dia, tapi pasti ada bagian-bagian kecil dari cangkang lama yang dia kangenin. I mean... sesempit-sempitnya cangkang lamanya, tapi cangkang itu pernah jadi tempatnya bernaung. Persis kayak mantan. Sebrengsek-brengseknya mereka, still, mereka orang yang pernah hadir dalam hati kita *pret* Apalagi gue tipikal orang yang berpikir kalau cinta itu unpredictable. Datang tanpa assalamu'alaikum atau ketok-ketok, tiba-tiba, BRAK! Pintu hati kita udah didobrak masuk gitu aja.

Gue kaitkan juga hal ini dengan lagunya Mas Anang, pipi dari Aurel. Separuh Jiwaku Pergi itu ga selamanya dusta, lho. Ketika kita putus sama seseorang, ada bagian dalam hati kita yang tercecar, entah dibawa orang itu, atau kandas tak berbekas, persis bentuk hubungan itu sendiri. Bentar, ya, gue nyetel lagunya Syahrini dulu.

Lanjut pada si siput. Gue juga bingung, kira-kira apa yang salah dari cangkang itu? Keliatannya sama-sama aja dengan cangkang yang lain. Kemudian gue sadar, gue baru aja memakai kacamata mereka yang selalu meremehkan. Dari luar, keliatannya memang baik-baik aja, tapi siapa yang tau di dalamnya? Sama kayak orang pacaran. Di depan sih mesra (apa lagi di depan mantan sebelumnya, hihihi), tapi siapa yang tau di belakang, mereka nyoba saling bunuh?!

Oke, itu rada lebai sih.

Mungkin, si siput meninggalkan cangkangnya karena emang udah expired. Mungkin dia nggak sanggup bayar kontrakan. Atau mungkin, ada siput lain yang lebih "berkuasa" atas cangkang itu. Ada banyak alasan.

Perbedaan si siput dengan manusia yang gagal move on, si siput selalu bisa menemukan cangkang baru karena mereka memang butuh. Mereka akan menerima cangkang baru dengan segala kekurangannya. Kita yang gagal move on (wait. KITA?!) biasanya kerjaannya cuma duduk di pojokan, ngestalk Twitter, berharap ada meteor jatuh dan pacar baru sang mantan koma. Yah, gue ga sejahat itu, sih.

Ada beberapa orang yang memilih jalan hidup si siput, tapi ada juga yang cuma berjalan. Terlalu banyak kualifikasi dan syarat untuk si calon cangkang baru, sampai-sampai mereka ga pernah nemuin cangkang. Trus akhirnya, mati sendirian.

Nggak, kok. Gue nggak nyumpahin kalian yang gagal move on buat mati. Tenang aja, nggak.

Sekian dulu deh penggalauan dari gue. Stay tune ya. Maaf kalo temanya rada dark gini. Mantan gue baru jadian soalnya.......

15 Most Favourite Authors in 2012

Hey fellas! Long time no see:) How's life? I was 'baking' some ideas into a pure novel (yes, I'm making it) when that sucks writer's block came all of sudden.

(Spoiler: I dunno how that comes but WB appears more often since. It kinda freaks me out).

Well....

First, I wanna congrats you a happy new year. May the Odds be ever in your Favor. And talking about 2013, I have no resolution bout it, and even if I have got it, who are you to tell?

Now sit back and relax, dude. These people would calm you down. They will hypnotize you with their enchanting idea, shut you up with their fascinating words spreading in beautiful, marvellous sentences. I think read them two days before school (HELL YEAH!) will be a great idea.

So here are my favourite authors of 2012:

1. J. K. Rowling
I know it's certainly unfair since she has become my favourite author for seven years (I read my first HP when I was 8), but she always fill my world with her books. And she's been always a great inspiration, too.

But to be honest, I'm not feeling boom-shakalaka with her new coming book, which titled The Casual Vacancy. Doesn't mean it's not fascinating, but I wasn't as satisfied as when I read HP. But every single Rowling's works are bundled flawlessly, so is TCV. Keep inspiring, Auntie! ;)

2. Roald Dahl
No one could beat him from this place. Roald Dahl such is my hero. I remember my first copy of his works was Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, and it simply became my favourite book all along.

3. Rick Riordan
Call me a liar. I used to be the one who yelled his works as 'hard to understand ones,' but it turned out... I like them. Riordan not only wrote... he poured actions and fantasy, wild movements that could make you awake to read his novel. Percy Jackson series and The Kane Chronicles series and The Heroes of Olympus series are such addictive books. Buy one of them and I guarantee you can't put it down before you read until very last page.

4. Suzanne Collins
She opened my eyes how astonishing dystopian literatures are. I got my THG from Gramedia as a present for I won a quiz (yes, call me lucky). I found myself nibbled my nails as I read Katniss' adventure in a brutal game, I clutched my blanket when she stumbled in a danger and I unleashed a satisfied breath as the trilogy was finished. But I found it kinda obnoxious that Collins didn't put Cato in Catching Fire and Mockingjay, and how Finnick gotta die. But still, it twirled fastastically, though.

5. Veronica Roth
Another author of dystopian literature! I fell in love with Divergent (which I bought in bahasa Indonesia) and she blinded me that I had to read Insurgent, the sequel, right after I finished the first book. And thank God I read Insurgent in English, which improve my English and increased my vocabulary table. The two are full of unstoppable actions; you will hold your breath often. She easily became my favourite author and I can't waittt for the final trilogy (which Roth jokingly called Detergent) that scheduled to published in fall this year.

6. Cassandra Clare
You gotta read her novels, I swear. Hers are not dystopian, but fantasy that mixed up with that-tricky-lovey-dovey-things. I don't know if The Mortal Instruments have traslated in bahasa Indonesia or not, because I bought them in Periplus. But they are not disappointing, I promise.

7. Brandon Mulls
Maybe you don't feel very familiar with his name but he is great, too. His works are kinda about fairy and other magic creatures, but they are not childish. Sadly, it's not that easy to find his novels, though in English. Now his fans in Indonesia are dangled with the final series, that hasn't realeased until now.

8. Nicholas Sparks
If you enjoy watching romantic movies, I'm sure you guys know who is he. He's the brain of the brilliant The Last Song and A Walk to Remember and Dear John and The Notebook. All he created are masterpieces, he knows how to tease his fans. I really enjoy all his works, but make it sure that you bring your tissues because his are teary, heart-pounding books. And I warned you, Sparks kindly likes tragic endings (sorry, Uncle).

9. Lauren Oliver
Aha! She writes dystopian books, too, and really get into it. When you read her books, all looked real. She brought us to a world where your hope are gone and all look worst to the fullest. I love her Delirium trilogy (which the final will come in February this year), they flow beautifully. But I'm not really keen on her triangle love idea, but yeah, it somehow doesn't disturb the lovely of these books, though.

10. John Green
Who doesn't know him, really? He blurted out and showed who is he with his lastest-yet-most-wonderstruck-book, The Fault in Our Stars. After I read that book, I noted that Green is tragic-endings-lover too, but soon after I Googled him, I found not so. I've read Looking for Alaska, Paper Towns, and An Abundance of Katherines too, and Green is really clever to cover the morals with humorous yet flowing sentences.

11. Aprilynne Pike
I love her series, Wings, and sadly it just came until the 2nd book, Spells, and it's uneasy to find her books in Periplus too (don't tell me about Kinokuniya. I was to be a snob who visited it last month and I ended up buying nothing because it's all the way more expensive than Peri+). But I enjoy reading her novels, ya know. They remind me that no matter how old you are, magic is always here, as Rowling taught me that magic never ends.

12. Paulo Coelho
I read his novel, The Alchemist lately. My first thought was that the novel is heavy to read, not that kind of book you bring to your bed before you sleep. But it turned out flowed lightly, extremely fascinating. He taught me about how wonderful this life. Maybe I'm coming off little wiser last year because of his book.

13. Sarah Dessen
We call her 'teenlit author' if she was an Indonesian. I just read her book, This Lullaby, and really loved it. She changed her characters in every novels, the main character could be a superstar, or a bookworm, or an author. But she really made her novels feel alive and I felt like parachuted to the depth of her work.

14. Ally Condie
She inspired me to make a good name for my characters HAHA. Well Ally Condie is the author of Matched trilogy (thanks to Refal who introduced me to these stunning works, though I misunderstood its title as 'Matjet'). They are dystopian books, too, and I felt awful and curious at the same time when I read them. Just imagine a world where everything is controlled by government, what will you work as and who will you marry. It's simply inconvenient, but Condie made it coming off alive.

15. Gayle Forman
She writes If I Stay and its sequel, Where She Went, which received generally good praises. I think they deserved a standing ovation. Forman is really cool, her novels are well-written, and the plot often unthinkable, hard to guess.

So, those are my favourites. Hbu?